Wednesday, September 10, 2008

An Open Letter About Bras

Dear Playtex,

You have no reason to know this about me, but I wear convertible bras on a pretty much daily basis. I like the underwire, the padding, and the fact that the gripper tape along the bottom keeps my tits from sliding out from under the underwires. They're not necessarily the most comfortable bras out there, but I'm a big girl with big girls and I like it when they look good. For this, I'm willing to make a few sacrifices.

For some time now, I've been wearing a convertible bra from another manufacturer. I liked it a lot, but I could tell it was getting to be time to replace it.

When JMS had a sale on all Playtex bras, I took this as a sign and ordered one of your Silken LuxuryTM Convertible Strapless bras.

I chose the same size as the bra I was currently wearing. Considering that they were similar styles and that bras are measured by inches, I did not think this would be a problem.

Well you can just color my face red, Playtex, because imagine my surprise when I tried to put the bra on only to find out that it was clearly too small!

I finally asked my wife to assist and she managed to get it securely fastened. Sure, it was a little tight, but, whatever! It's not like a bra is a comfort garment, anyway.

I've been wearing this damn thing for seven hours now. I can tell you with all sincerity that, if I were not at work, the timer on that would have stopped at around five hours. I am positive that I am bruising as I type this.

This leads me to a point of curiosity that I just have to appease, Playtex, and I am hoping that you can help me out with this.

Do y'all have different measuring tapes out there in the Playtex factory than the rest of the world carries?

Is there some particular reason why I should need to remember a separate and different size for my Playtex bras than for the rest of the bra manufacturers of the world?

Do y'all just not get the concept of bra sizing?

Help me out , here, Playtex. Can I get some crib notes or something? Eventually I will need to procure more bras, and basing my sizing decisions on logic is clearly not working out that well.

Bruised but Perky in Northern California

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