Egoist-Egoist!

Y'all may not have noticed this, but my brain's been a little bit all over the map lately. Plus I've been busy at work, which is leaving my thinking time a little low.

I spent some time at work yesterday correcting a mistake. Nothing big. Just the kind of little thing that would make something look funky. A stupid, little oops that, fortunately, I caught well before it was too late. Unfortunately, I caught it after the point that meant I would have to redo work to fix it. I hate redoing work. I'm a big believer in getting it right the first time.

Not that I always do.

It got me to thinking, though. Why do we have such a hard time admitting our mistakes? Is it really so bad to admit that you just made 23 copies of a 30 page document with page 17 upside down? Or that yeah, maybe you did check the wrong box on that form and it wasn't someone else's clerical error? The kind of little mistakes we make when we're going too fast, or not paying enough attention, or really not as sure as we think we are about the way things need to be done. The kind of mistakes we look at once we've noticed and feel really stupid for having made it in the first place.

I've certainly made my fair share of mistakes. As much as I'd prefer to believe that I'm perfect, I know I'm not. But I'm more than willing to pony up and own up to my mistakes when I make them.

The kind of mistakes that really make me mad, though, are the ones that occur when the person should know better. They know how to do it correctly but don't. Or they should know they don't know how to do it correctly and just make something up instead of asking.

Because why can't you just go to someone and say "you know, I only get these once every few months and I've totally forgotten what I'm supposed to do with it."

Is that so hard?

Yeah, I  know.

Ego.

Ego says "I was told how to do this, so I'm going to do it like this, even though I'm pretty sure that's not right because it's better than letting someone know I don't know how to do it."

Ego says "Damn that was a stupid thing to do! Well, let me just try to cover it up and hope nobody notices."

Ego sucks.

Ego, by the way, is the reason that I may be throwing down at a PTA meeting tonight over an anonymous letter nominating the departing Board member for SweetPea's position on the Board.

Too bad nominations were last month.

The departing Board member is from the "pot roast" club. She likes things to be done the way they've always been done, and I can understand how that's easier.

I may have mentioned before that our school is in a lower middle class neighborhood. Our PTA does not have a lot of money. Nor does our school. Nor do our families. A lot of the events that we put on are a big deal for the families. There are families that don't pay electric bills so that they can go to Harvest Festival. Other families will, literally, scrimp all year to go. Not that it's very expensive, but that demonstrates how some of our families struggle.

Our PTA (and this person, in particular) has taken on this attitude that the events we put on are for the families. That we don't need to worry about spending the money to do it, or whether or not we'll be making the money back or, heaven forbid, making more money because it's for the families.

And I totally get where she's coming from. I do.

At the same time, though... That's just stupid!

PTA needs more money because it helps the school, and it helps the families.

Moreover, we can easily make money for the PTA without costing our families more.

So why the hell wouldn't we want to?

The departing member of the Board has an issue with SweetPea and I because we're shakers. We see a problem, something that can be done better and we want to fix it. It's not that this member doesn't want PTA to be better and stronger and have more money. It's ego that's making her believe that our making PTA better means that she's been wrong all this time.

I have a strong suspicion that the anonymous letter was left by her. I'm also of the opinion that she's picking on SweetPea, instead of me, not only because she thinks that SweetPea is the easier "kill", but, also, I think she believes I'll be easier to "control" if SweetPea were no longer on the Board.

Which totally goes to show what she knows.

If she knew me at all, she'd understand that SweetPea is the one that settles me down and keeps me from requiring the intervention of law enforcement.

Um.

Just saying.