Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Gellin' Like a Felon


I'm sitting here at my desk at work.

I'm supposed to be working on things for overtime, but my brain is so far gone that I can't keep track of anything. Then again, it's been like that all day.

Maybe it's been the little chocolatey sugar pills I've been popping all day?

Um.

Nah.

Couldn't be.

Anywho, I wanted to check in and comment about something that I should probably be too embarassed to post.

Since that's never stopped me before, I don't see why it should stop me now.

So I was sitting here at my desk, minding my own business, and, for whatever reason, I put my curled up fist-hands on my hips (yes, I put my hands on my hips at work, while sitting. Can we move on?), and, do you know what I discovered?

Squish.

And jiggle.

Not just a little bit of squish and jiggle, mind you. But a lot more squish and jiggle than I feel comfortable with.

I keep pushing on my hips, now, because it's a familiar feeling, and I'm trying to figure it out so I can describe it to you.

Yes, I know. I'm fat.

Not a newsflash.

But it's not that long ago when I had a fairly decent amount of muscle, too.

If you'd felt my thighs when I worked for the agency before this one, you'd have understood.

Um.

I had very strong thighs.

Now? Not so much.

I have to say that I will be very thankful when I get to a place where I no longer have stress to eat.

I know, I know. It's more than that. It's way more than that.

But that's definitely a start.

And maybe then I'd spend less time sabotaging myself and then getting frustrated that I'm not losing weight.

Maybe.

PS:

1. I feel like the whole world is holding it's breath. But it might just be me.

2. It's 20 minutes to 5 and my coworker is eating again.

1 comment:

Dawn on MDI said...

And I used to weigh 135 and be a size 5. A million years ago when I was 20 and living on diet coke and cigarettes. Now I'm 43 and thing have settled, both in my life and on my body. Sounds like the stress level (or lack thereof) is good for you, but you might have to do some gym time or lettuce adjustment to get where you want to be. Adulthood sucks, don't it? Wait'll you hit menopause - buckle up baby, it's a WILD ride!